linkmachinego.com

20 October 2001
[comics] Mad Man — MSNBC interview with Alan Moore‘[Interviewer] Are you planning on attending the “From Hell” premiere? [Moore] If left to my own devices, I wouldn’t. I’m not really a big cinema guy, and I don’t really like public appearances. I only signed up to be a writer. I didn’t really sign up to be a celebrity. When I became a comic writer there was no more obscure job in the world. But my daughters, they’ve got some sort of plan that involves kidnapping Johnny Depp and giving him roofies. So I’d probably better be there.’ [via Barbelith Underground]
[aftermath] The Last Post — the inside story on the 90,000 mails per-day sent to addresses at World Trade Centre which don’t exist anymore and one of the people who used to deliver it…

‘Together the carriers have recreated, in miniature, a semblance of their old routes. The World Trade Centre buildings were allotted sorting areas ringed with dozens and dozens of beige and grey metal pigeonholes to accept the buildings’ mail.Thornton’s cubicle is marked with a large sign that reads “1 World Trade Centre” in bold black letters. Each of the companies on her old route has its own pigeonhole. She sits in this cramped, dim space for eight hours a day sorting mail. When a pigeonhole fills up, workers come and dump the overflow into large, marked crates. Thornton says she doesn’t want to feel ungrateful. After all, she is alive and getting a pay cheque. But most days she feels lost and disorientated. She misses the din of the building, the rush of the lifts, the friendly chats in the lobbies. “I have no place to go,” she says. “It is like I am homeless.”‘

21 October 2001
[history] Hinges of Opportunity — was 9-11 a “hinge moment” in history… where everything changes and we feel that nothing is the same as before? [via Ghost in the Machine]

‘What changes after a hinge is our stories of ourselves. Who we are, how we got that way, where we’re headed, and what makes us tick. The lesson is that any cultural revolution represents a grand new alignment of great forces — technological, economic, environmental and spiritual. These shape the tales we tell to make sense of our new world.’

[books] All Authors are Pyschotic — interview with Douglas Coupland‘…when you look at the history of the smile in the photo… up until World War II most people in photographs had their normal faces. And then Kodak and other camera people and filmmakers always had their people smile, and then we entered this cult of the smile collectively. If you try not smiling when people are taking your picture they basically tell you to fuck off and start smiling.’ [Related: BBC News on Coupland, via Feeling Listless]
22 October 2001
[distractions] Check out:
[movies] Return of the Legend — brief interview with Nick Broomfield about the documentary he is currently working on… ‘Broomfield is an undisputed success at marketing his own image, even down to starring in self-parodic adverts for cars. And he’s loaded: an English country pile; a place in Santa Monica. What’s interesting is how he divides opinion. Depending on who you talk to among those who really know him – producers, co-producers, commissioning editors, journalists, film-makers and friends – he’s an innovator, a shark, a genius, a fraud, a legend or a has-been; people love him or hate him. The work is brilliant or boring, revealing or repetitious, always fresh or endlessly formulaic. They all have to agree, however, that a Nick Broomfield film is hard to ignore.’
[comics] Excellent, long Comics Journal interview with Peter Bagge by Gary Groth … ‘Ya know, Alan Moore recently described the current state of alternative comics to me really well, comparing it to right now as opposed to five or ten years ago. He said it’s kind of like somebody left the top of the soda pop bottle off, where it looks the same and it tastes the same, but the fizz is gone.’ [Related: Bagge’s Website]
23 October 2001
[politics] ‘Those that are not with us are against us’ — interesting transcript of a conversation between the Labour MP for Shrewsbury Paul Marsden and the Chief Whip Hilary Armstrong about UK Government policy over Afghanistan…

‘HA: In fact we may well hold a vote, but if we do, it will be whipped. PM: That is outrageous. You won’t even give us a free vote on whether we go to war – it is an issue which should be a matter of conscience. HA: War is not a matter of conscience. Abortion and embryo research are matters of conscience, but not wars. PM: Are you seriously saying blowing people up and killing people is not a moral issue? HA: It is government policy that we are at war. You astound me.’

[wtf?] A long way from Ambridge — Afghan’s are addicted to a BBC World Service Soap opera based on The Archers

‘The Afghans were very news hungry,” says Andrew Skuse, a social anthropologist who wrote his PhD on the success of the soap. “They really trusted the BBC. After years of abuse of the media under various regimes, the BBC was seen as more trustworthy than the national service. Some thought it was the national service. They hadn’t a clue where it was located. People would often tell me they thought the BBC was a village in Afghanistan”.’

24 October 2001
[comics] Two interviews with the Big Scary Hippy Magician Guy (who writes comics) …

Comic Book Resources interview with Moore ‘The thing that turned me towards magic was a panel in From Hell where William Gull was saying something to the effect that the human mind is one place where all of the gods and monsters in human mythology are arguably real, in all of their grandeur and monstrosity. And after writing I thought, oh shit, that’s true. Now I am going to have to rearrange my entire life around this. There is no way to disprove it. I thought I was writing this great piece of Gothic villain dialogue. The gods and monsters inarguably exist and they are real. Because if they don’t exist how many people died because of them, or how many history changing things have been done in the name of these Gods that don’t exist? If they don’t exist why do they kill so many of us in their name?’ [via WEF]

Massive Two Part Onion AV Club interview with Moore [Part 1 | Part 2] ‘I’ve got the whole of Big Numbers plotted. I’d got this enormous A1 sheet of paper the size of a tablecloth that had been divided into 40 rows down the side, and 12 columns along the top. One column for each of the 12 issues, 40 rows for each of the 40 characters. And then, in this grid in tiny, incomprehensibly small biro writing which looks like the work of a mental patient, and which gives you a migraine just to look at it, there is what happens to each of the 40 characters in every one of the 12 issues. It’s this map of the entire plot. I’ve never done it with any other work, because it is kind of an insane thing to do. I’ve kind of got all that stuff in my head anyway, so the only real reason for writing it down on paper is just to impress and frighten. But because I’d still got the plot, we were able to reconstruct the basis of a 12-episode TV drama series. Whether it’ll ever make it to TV or not, no idea.’ [thanks to Kenny]
[books] Sue Townsend: You ask the questions‘[Q] Where do you see Adrian Mole aged 51? [A] Still trying to flog his abysmal novel, Lo! The Flat Hills of My Homeland, to a London publisher. He’ll almost certainly have early prostate trouble and I think he’ll be really strong on cardigans, in particular the Marks & Spencer zip-up range for men.’
25 October 2001
[politics] You can’t beat a bit of bullying — more on the way the way a Labour Whip dealt with an awkward MP over government policy in Afghanistan. ‘…they found it impossible to stick to the argument. Within minutes they had moved from the issue of loyalty to attendance records to trust (Marsden: “It would help if your deputy didn’t send me snotty letters”), to the question of war as a matter of conscience, to risible fibs about telephone messages (“Er, perhaps I got the wrong number”), to appeasement “Don’t you dare!”), to the pressing question of which of the two was the more northern (Marsden: “Do you mind? I spent four years at Teesside Polytechnic”).’
[tv] It’s nearly ten o’clock on a Thursday Night… time for Attachments Everybody Hates Attachments. The script for the final episode has been leaked apparently: ‘JON: FUCK! Gareth’s faxed all our HTML to a chatroom! DYSON: No problem! Just re-route it, stick it on a floppy and save it as an animated gif! JON: I can’t! I’m too busy reformatting the coffee machine! TESS: Oh Christ! We’re really IN THE SHIT!’
26 October 2001
[search requests] People keep visiting via Google searching for this — so here you go…

The Sopranos... Just tell us where bin-Laden is and fuhgedaboudit...

[books] Out of the ordinary — Douglas Coupland has been touring England taking photo’s‘Coupland adores objects, and most of his book-tour photography has been of hotel rooms, shop windows, products, promotional displays. But why do it? “I’ve never taken pictures before and I said to myself, ‘Dammit, I’m going to learn how to do this. I don’t remember my dreams. Do you? No one does. But if you wake up and write them down straight away, you can look at it 15 years later and like, ‘I remember that dream perfectly.’ It’s the same with this 36 days, or 46 days, or whatever it has been, I really want to remember them. But your body tends to remember the airport and the train rumble, rumble, so I’m trying to remember the good stuff.”‘
27 October 2001
[war] Steve Bell’s brilliant step-by-step guide to “smart-bombing”. ‘…can we talk about something else?’
[no logo] Between McWorld and Jihad — Naomi Klein on 9-11 and the anti-corporate movement…

‘Of course, there is little evidence that America’s most wanted Saudi-born millionaire has a grudge against capitalism (if Osama bin Laden’s rather impressive global export network stretching from cash-crop agriculture to oil pipelines is any indication, it seems unlikely). And yet for the movement some people call “anti-globalisation” others call “anti-capitalism” (and I tend to just sloppily call “the movement”), it’s difficult to avoid discussions about symbolism: about all the anti-corporate signs and signifiers – the culture-jammed logos, the guerrilla-warfare stylings, the choices of brand name and political targets – that make up the movement’s dominant metaphors. Many political opponents of anti-corporate activism are using the symbolism of the World Trade Centre and Pentagon attacks to argue that young activists, playing at guerrilla war, have now been caught out by a real war.’

28 October 2001
[film] O Brothers, Thou Art Cinematic Gold Dust — Sunday Times profile of Joel and Ethan Cohen‘Pranksterism has always been a feature of Coen productions. In the days of Blood Simple they invented a crusty old English film editor called Roderick Jaynes, who blasted the production before dropping out of sight. The awful Jaynes cropped up again for Barton Fink and Fargo, lambasting the “inept” scripts and “silliness” of the camera work before vanishing again. His name, nevertheless, appeared prominently on the credits, and for Fargo he was nominated for an Oscar. The Coens persuaded Albert Finney to dress up and attend the awards ceremony in disguise, but his cover was blown by the trade paper Variety and the academy huffily withdrew its nomination.’
[comics] What Warren Ellis would do if he were a comics publisher [login as Guest] …

‘My initial plan would be to release two books a month. One of them would be original, and one would be reprint. There are major works that have, for whatever reason, been lost to the modern reader. AMERICAN FLAGG issues 1-12, Howard Chaykin. THE NEW ADVENTURES OF HITLER, Grant Morrison & Steve Yeowell with Nick Abadzis. NIGHT MUSIC, the short stories of P Craig Russell. Disappeared. I’d even attempt to license some away: DC Vertigo has let Milligan and Fegredo’s wonderful FACE vanish, and Milligan and Ormston’s darkly funny THE EATERS too. If they don’t want to publish them, I’ll publish them. Alan Moore has probably published enough creator-owned short work in enough venues to merit a collection. In fact, you know what I’d do? I’d assemble what was completed of BIG NUMBERS. I’d go to Alan’s for a couple of days and interview him fairly exhaustively about the project. I’d spend a week talking to a few other people by email. Give me another three weeks to collate and arrange it all, and I’ve got BIG NUMBERS: The Lost Graphic Novel, a book about the thwarted realist breakthrough work of the 80s.’

29 October 2001
[books] More from Adrian Mole: ‘Glenn has been excluded from school, for calling Tony Blair a twat.’
[flatmates] Cleaning The Fucking Kitchen For Dummies‘The pizza may have arrived at your door on its own, but once you eat half of it, it’s dead and it won’t actually go away on its own. It doesn’t matter if you hide it somewhere like some sort of demented squirrel, it will stay there. Unless someone throws it away. That means you, if the world is just, which it plainly isn’t.’ [via Ms. Woo]
30 October 2001
[comics] Scot plans to make Batman hang up cape — brief interview with Grant Morrison and Mark Millar from the Sunday Times … In the wake of September 11, violent superhumans are not enough anymore. We should be putting the current international developments in context rather than just having wrestling matches between colourful characters. I’ve already started writing X-Men as a pacifist comic. They don’t believe in violence. They want to change the world in other ways. I don’t think there will be as much fisticuffs anymore. I always thought that was rubbish anyway. I’m more into the philosophical basis of comics, the ideas they explore.’ [Related: Newsarama on the Article, via Barbelith Underground]
[sysadmin] An Actual Letter from a Fed-Up Systems Administrator‘Never fuck with your systems administrators, because they know what you do with all your free time.’ [via BenHammersley.com]
31 October 2001
[books] First Chapter of Emergence by Steven Johnson… [via kottke.org]

‘…they solve problems by drawing on masses of relatively stupid elements, rather than a single, intelligent “executive branch.” They are bottom-up systems, not top-down. They get their smarts from below. In a more technical language, they are complex adaptive systems that display emergent behavior. In these systems, agents residing on one scale start producing behavior that lies one scale above them: ants create colonies; urbanites create neighborhoods; simple pattern-recognition software learns how to recommend new books. The movement from low-level rules to higher-level sophistication is what we call emergence.’

[questions] You ask the Questions: Larry Hagman‘[Q] JR had many classic lines, but which one of them is your own favourite? [A] “Once you get rid of integrity, the rest is a piece of cake”.’
[funny ha ha] A couple of amusing Onions:

Let Us Freak‘Girl, please allow me to break it down for you. You are the love of my life, and I would travel to the ends of the earth to prove my love for you. I would fly to Europe in order to personally select the finest champagne for you to drink. I would climb to the peak of the highest mountain to demonstrate that my lower-back muscles are powerful and won’t give out. I would weave for you the most comfortable silk sheets ever known to creation. I am the man for you, and I will make you want to get down and get funk-ass nasty with me. I will make you scream and shout all hours of the night. I will make sweet love to you like no man has ever before. In addition to all of that, I will wash you.’ [via Haddock]

Now More Than Ever, Humanity Needs My Back To The Future Fan Fiction‘ Sadly, the flux-capacitor technology masterminded by Dr. Emmet Brown remains a fantasy. As such, we cannot go back in time and change the terrible events of Sept. 11. But we can draw strength by drawing close to one another and holding fast to the faith that tomorrow will be a brighter day. And also by reading my Back To The Future fan fiction.’
1 November 2001
[distraction] TV Misguidance — DIY TV Go Home. ‘20.00 Fear of a Blue Planet … David Attenborough gets eaten by Sharks. (Repeat)’
[comics] Pieces of War — interview with Joe Sacco from Sequential Tart‘I do comics because I’m a cartoonist. It’s as simple as that. My roommate is a documentary film maker and I see the trouble he has getting funding and making things happen. A cartoonist needs only pen and paper. I’m not taking a two-man camera crew with me on my trips. I think comics are an inviting medium, one that pulls in a reader who might not otherwise read a book about Bosnia or the Palestinians, for example. I feel I can present very hard and complicated material in comics form if I give myself the space. With comics, I feel I can really drop a reader into a time and place. The medium allows me to use flashbacks seamlessly. (Those reenactments popular in documentaries these days seem so embarrassingly out of place.) You add those attributes together, and comics turns out to be a great medium for something like journalism.’
2 November 2001
[profile] The prime of Ms Julie Burchill — quite an intriguing interview … ‘From reading her columns, it is hard to gauge what her values are, if indeed she has any. “Well, I wouldn’t take money from a poor box and I always give to beggars. Can’t go out in Brighton without giving away at least 50 quid. When you look into their eyes, it’s like looking in to the eyes of Jesus. That sounds corny, but I just love that moment of connection.”‘
[film] Typhoons, binges… then a heart attack — interview with Martin Sheen about Apocalypse Now‘The shoot is, of course, a cinematic legend. It was regarded as such a year before the movie was even released. Typhoons destroyed several huge sets. Sheen had a heart attack, aged only 36. Brando – obese, overpaid – was rumoured in the press to have been difficult and self- indulgent, though no one on set thought so.”Marlon wasn’t difficult at all,” Sheen says. “Never. The only problem we had was the image, his presence, but he’d just dismiss it. He treated everyone the same – Francis, me, the guys on the crew. Also, out of all of us, I think he’d spent the most time in the third world. So he was more aware of the fact that the world’s not made up of first-class service and over-privileged people. I was in awe, because for my generation of actors there were only two guys, Marlon and [James] Dean. And for Dean there was only one – Marlon.”‘
[paul is dead] The Fool on the Hill … Did Paul McCartney expose himself on the Magical Mystery Tour film? ‘The zoom view clearly shows the left coat tail billowing up. There does seem to be a fairly clear image of his penis extending out from under it and pointing to his right at a slightly upward angle. The coloring really adds to the impression: the shaft is darker toned than the head which would be consistent with the coloring of the shaft and head (glans) of a penis. (Yes, unlike most British men, Paul is circumsized.)’ [Related: Paul is Dead, link via Robot Wisdom]
3 November 2001
[comics] Wanted: superhero — interesting analysis of Marvel’s business problems … Comic-book publishing remains nicely profitable, with a 27% operating margin, but it contributes only 20% of Marvel’s revenue. Licensing has next to no costs but is stuck at 8% of sales–just where it was in 1992. The drag on the company is the Toy Biz division. It develops Marvel characters and Pokémon and World Championship Wrestling figures. The unit had an operating loss of $45 million on revenues of $167 million (72% of the total) in 2000. A plunge in toy sales this year has depressed results further.’ [via Neil Alien]
[war] Victory for the doom-mongers in a passionate war of words — Simon Hoggart on Labour MP’s and Afghanistan. On a speech by George Galloway: ‘…he had never thought he would see the day when Labour – Labour! – MPs supported the use of cluster bombs. “Is this war so finely poised that we need the use of cluster bombs?” He recalled Clare Short crying on Brighton beach at the very thought of land mines. “But cluster bombs are much worse than land mines.” Ms Short sat squat, alone and disgruntled on the front bench as Mr Galloway reached his peroration. It was the Northern Alliance who had destroyed and beggared Afghanistan with its mediaeval obscurantism. It was the Northern Alliance who hanged the former president and stuffed his penis into his mouth – “those are your new best friends!” he raged.’ [Related: Hoggart Archive]
[quotables] Dwight D. Eisenhower: ‘Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children… This is not a way of life at all, in any true sense. Under the cloud of threatening war, it is humanity hanging from a cross of iron.’ [via Wood s Lot]
4 November 2001
[reading] Snakes and Ladders by Alan Moore and Eddie Campbell‘Sat in a sandwich bar in Westminster I meet the sharp south-London wideboy occultist that I’d created some years previously for a U.S. comic book. He looks at me. He nods, and smiles, and walks away. Years later, in another place, he steps out from the dark and speaks to me. He whispers: I’ll tell you the ultimate secret of Magic. Any cunt can do it.’
[cheggers] The show must go on [Part 1 | Part 2] … Louis Theroux meets Keith Chegwin. ‘I look up and there’s a man standing there, with short legs and receding grey hair, he looks like Keith Allen, the actor. Then I realise it’s Keith Chegwin. I must be tired. He changes into his stage gear: blue shorts and an orange Hawaiian shirt. We head for the stage. As we’re puffing up the stairs, past the pipes with bubbles in them, Keith says: “Do you do gigs? You should!… Coronary classic, these stairs! I want somebody from St John’s, now!” I part ways with Keith as we approach the main dance floor, where Keith will be performing. The club is loud and packed with drunk students. The energy is great – despite being tired, I’m caught up in the swell of excitement. Keith hits the stage, and screams through his microphone, so loud the sound is distorted and barely comprehensible. “Have we got anyone here who can’t stand the effing sight of me?” There’s a huge roar.’
5 November 2001
[war] The Sims Take on Al Qaeda — a look at computer simulations of war and terrorism …

‘He is looking for ways that seemingly small actions have big consequences. “I think about terrorism in terms of popcorn,” he said. “You assume you’ll always have some kernels that are going to pop. How much lower does the temperature have to get before you have a dramatic decrease in the ability of terrorists to operate?” His research has found that when the underlying relationships between color blocks are constantly shifting, the blocks look to the government as an anchor and their colors mesh into a pattern of support. But if the blocks share a common concern about risks from the outside world, they are more likely to become disaffected and blend with dissident groups. Lustick’s flashing grid is conflict in its most abstract form. That turns out to be its greatest strength–as well as its most glaring weakness. Researchers are painfully aware that their models omit the messy edges of real life, and some of them might turn out to be critical.’
[tv] Don’t stop me now — an interview with Jonathan Ross … ‘Ross owes his success to his unembarrassability. Much of his humour is at his own expense. Hence the interminable bad-taste jokes, and the celebrated occasion on which he exposed himself on They Think It’s All Over last year. (He protests: “The BBC loved it! They thumbed it with something like “Wossie whips it out”. They used my cock as a selling point. Well, I didn’t show my cock anyway, not to the audience or to the cameras. I showed it to Nick [Hancock], and I showed it to Ian Wright, who looked suitably horrified. There was a great photograph of him recoiling in absolute disgust that I was thinking of having it made into a T-shirt.”‘
6 November 2001
[comics] Girls’ World — excellent interview with Dan Clowes about Ghost World‘”I once had this idea to do a comic where a mother tattoos a message on her baby’s head so that years later, when he’s losing his hair, he finally sees it. It would say something like, ‘I never loved you’.” Clowes lets out a bright, engaging laugh, so contagious it’s hard not to laugh along with him, until you realise exactly what it is he’s just said.’ [via Kooky Mojo]
[postmortem] Hijackers’ Meticulous Strategy of Brains, Muscle and Practice — good overview of the planning behind 9-11… ‘With all the suspects dead and no conclusive evidence, as yet, of any accomplices, investigators have been left to recreate the architecture and orchestration of the plot largely from the recorded minutiae of the hijackers’ brief American lives: their cellphone calls, credit card charges, Internet communications and automated teller machine withdrawals. What has emerged, nearly two months into the investigation, is a picture in which the roles of the 19 hijackers are so well defined as to be almost corporate in their organization and coordination.’ [via Robot Wisdom]
[tv] Other Listings Magazine — more DIY TV Go Home‘18.30 Good Old Dad. First of a new six part series in which Richard Briers meets children he illegitimately fathered as a result of a series of sordid sex sessions during filming of the first series of “The Good Life”‘
7 November 2001
[tv] You ask the questions: Louis Theroux‘[Q] Who was more scary to interview, Eugene Terreblanche (of the Afrikaner Resistance Movement) or Paul Daniels? [A] The company of Terreblanche is the scariest. He smelt of booze and he did seem a bit volatile, switching between being overly friendly to angry and crazed from moment to moment. With Paul the terror is that he’s going to tell you another endless Frank Sinatra anecdote.’
[comics] The Best of the Marvel and DC Comp Boxes — Mark Millar does brief reviews of last months comics… Millar on Marvel’s Alias: ‘Ah, Bendis. I love you. Who else would have Luke Cage shagging the title character up the arse in the opening issue of a new Marvel comic? I haven’t read issue two yet, but the buzz seems to be really building on this so I’m looking forward to it.’ [Kinda Related: JinxWorld]
8 November 2001
[tea] Stupid Christmas Gift Ideas from LinkMachineGo… for the tea drinker in your family. ‘Your favorite sipping spot isn’t always equipped with a place to park your soggy tea bags. This 12 oz. ceramic mug has a built-in bag holder. use it to carry your fresh tea bag to a favorite spot, brew your tea, then tuck used bag into pocket and sip your tea while its hot.’ [via The Daily Chump]
[tv] A Taxi Ride to Success — interview with Rob Brydon from Marion and Geoff … ‘Marion and Geoff was a series of exquisite ten-minute monologues delivered by Brydon in the character of Keith Barrat, a Welsh minicab driver. Keith spoke to us via a video camera mounted on the passenger side of his dashboard – mostly about his wife, Marion, his two children, Alun and Rhys (‘little smashers’), and his wife’s new partner, Geoff, the pharmaceutical salesman of the year. In the face of dreadful domestic and professional disappointment, Keith was endlessly optimistic – which only seemed to confirm the depths of his despair. “Beautiful day,” he would announce brightly, before looking up through the windscreen at the sky and adding, “Bit overcast. But Mr Bluebird’s on my shoulder.”‘
9 November 2001
[film] Go Ahead, Pinko Liberals, Make My Day … Guardian interview with John Milius. ‘The second world war has replaced the western as a morality play, as a venue where these things exist. The western is no longer the western; we’ve changed our attitude towards the Indians, the frontier, the open spaces. So the second world war is a much better place to say, “Here’s what you should measure up to be.” It’s no longer Shane. It’s Sergeant Rock.’
[tv] Turner’s Lost Love, CNN, Has A Doomsday Plan in the Can — great story on Ted Turner and CNN’s “end-of-the-world video”… ‘Turner, it seems, has been a doom-and-gloom kind of guy from the very day in June 1980 when he launched the cable network. He said then, as only he could, “We gonna go on air June 1, and we gonna stay on until the end of the world. When that time comes, we’ll cover it, play ‘Nearer, My God, to Thee,’ and sign off.” Ten years later, I’m told, Turner used CNN production facilities to create what he called his “end-of-the-world” video. Sources tell me it consists of a recording of “Nearer, My God,” over footage of a waving American flag. Turner is said to have ordered the tape locked away until it was determined that the world was about to end. “It was like a sign-off tape that you often see in the middle of the night,” says one source. “But to Ted, it was a sign-off forever.”‘ [via Follow Me Here]
[school] Bullies Reunited‘Bullies Reunited is a site for those of us who spent our schooldays tormenting, ridiculing and psychologically disturbing other children who were smaller, weirder, younger, poorer – or, indeed, richer than ourselves. Kids who wore glasses. Kids who walked a bit funny. Kids who needed go to the toilet too often.’ [via I Love Everything]
10 November 2001
[books] Driven by daemons — excellent profile and interview of Philip Pullman‘He is emotionally involved. He sits in the shed and makes it up and he weeps, yes, weeps copiously at the tragedies that unfold. He frightens himself and upsets himself and makes himself laugh. If the story evangelises, it isn’t him that’s doing it. It is merely his nature to admire qualities such as courage, kindness, intellectual curiosity, inclusiveness and open-mindedness, and to deplore cruelty, intolerance and fanatical zealotry, but he wouldn’t dream of writing stories to promote that world-view. If stories teach, that is not his conscious intention. “It’s craftsmanship. Your aim must be to tell a story as well as you can, shaping it and bringing the emotional currents to their… peak of emotional swishing about. You turn the raw materials, and all those loose bits of imagination and experience and memory, into something that stands up like a table with four legs and that doesn’t fall over when you put your elbows on it.”‘
[comics] Jack The Ripper: From Hell … a Master Mason comments on From Hell — the film and comic. ‘As unlikely as it may seem, From Hell is not simply a product of Hollywood greed or opportunism. It is based on a remarkable “graphic novel,” of the same name, by writer Alan Moore and artist Eddie Campbell. Graphic novels, a fairly new phenomenon, are pricey novel-length comics, most often published in quality paperback format and usually aimed at a teen or adult audience. From Hell, an engrossing retelling of the Jack the Ripper chronology, is possibly the most prominent graphic novel yet published. It weighs in at over 500 pages of a detailed story, with an additional 42 pages of notes and annotations, where Moore explains some of the more obscure details of Ripper history and gives reasons for choosing among the dozens of competing theories of who did what when. This is important to note because, despite the reputation of comic books for shallow plots and characters, From Hell, the graphic novel, is a multi-layered story that is more akin to the complex novels of Thomas Pynchon than to the simple comics of Walt Disney.’ [via I Love Everything]
11 November 2001
[furthur] “We are all doomed to spend our lives watching a movie of our lives – we are always acting on what has just finished. It happened at least 1/30th of a second ago. We think we’re in the present, but we aren’t. The present we know is only a movie of the past, and we will really never be able to control the present through ordinary means.” — Tom Wolfe quoting Ken Kesey’s philosophy in The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test. [Related: Author and hippie icon Kesey dies]
[war] Things that jumped out at me while reading the Observer today …

Two months on, the new battles at Ground Zero‘…Ground Zero is all crooked, cruel ruins bayoneted on to steel mesh. Under the harsh glare of floodlights, the arm of a heavy crane lifts another limb of incinerated steel from the dunes of rubble. There is a flare, a burst of flame – for the buried fire still burns white-hot – and a pall of ghastly black smoke rises into the night, blocking the view of the illuminated Empire State Building. The stench of the plume is sickly-sweet; everyone knows what it is but no one says so. Only: “this is how Auschwitz must have stunk only diluted,” as one police forensic scientist remarked. “Fifteen hundred degrees down there,” says a fireman, “and still burning”.’

Bin Laden taunts the West: ‘I’m ready to die’ ‘The full transcript of their discussions has yet to be released but it is clear they were wide-ranging. Bin Laden was, according to Mir yesterday, in “high spirits”. “He’s very healthy and he laughs a lot. Previously he was very softly spoken. Now he speaks like an experienced orator, he is very hard-hitting… There’s a big change in that man.”‘

Britain placed under state of emergency‘…will pave the way for indefinite imprisonment of foreign nationals who the Government suspects are terrorists, and comes less than 24 hours after warnings from America that Britain is a top target for Osama bin Laden’s al-Qaeda terrorist network. The move reveals the seriousness the Government places on the threat to Britain. Such orders can be used only in times of war or when there has been an event that puts the security of the nation at risk. Whitehall sources said the order would not be reviewed ‘for at least a year’.’
12 November 2001
[film] Shallow Hal — Salon previews the next Farrelly Brothers film … ‘Hal (Jack Black) is a pudgy, not overly good-looking guy who, after taking the advice of his dying dad, nevertheless thinks he’s entitled to the most gorgeous babes. He and his pal Mauricio (Jason Alexander) spend most of their time comparing notes on which women are most perfectly suited to enter their dazzling orbit. They succeed with virtually none of them, of course, and can’t accept what they have on the rare occasions when they do. (Mauricio rejects his knockout of a girlfriend because her second toe is longer than her big one — this from a man who tries to disguise his baldness with what looks like a yarmulke of iron shavings.)’
[distraction] Swear-o-Tron — takes the strain out of verbal abuse … ‘…big dog’s cock…’ [via Pete’s Weblog]
[comics] Excellent interview with Neil Gaiman in January Magazine … On Sandman: ‘At the time that I was doing it, I was very much hoping that it would change things for the medium of comics. Looking back on it, I don’t think an awful lot. It did an awful lot for Sandman in that graphic novels are still out there, they still sell 80,000-odd a year, year in, year out in America alone. But what I was definitely hoping would happen was the same kind of thing that happened when I read Alan Moore was doing on The Swamp Thing. I went: Well, hang on. Here is someone writing stuff for adults and writing stuff with as much imagination and verve and depth as anything else out there: any other medium out there. I wasn’t going: Oh, I want to write Swamp Thing. I was going: Oh, I want to create my own one of these. It will be interesting to see if in a few years time, the generation that was raised on Sandman do actually start creating more literary and more interesting comics.’ [Related: Gaiman’s Website, link via Sore Eyes]
13 November 2001
[profile] Leader of the pack — brief profile of American journalist Seymour Hersh‘Why aren’t there more reports like Hersh’s? “I don’t know,” he says. “You know, after September 11 Washington is a very unhappy and increasingly anxious town. We’ve got a very acute strategic problem. When they took out the World Trade Centre we had to get the response right and we didn’t get it right. The word for Washington now is ‘scary’ – it’s impossible not to get something for a story here.”‘ [Related: Escape and Evasion by Hersh]
[film] Hollywood’s hottest fifty-something — an interview with Terry Zwigoff … ‘This woman called me last week from New York. She said, “We’re doing an ad for Gap, and we want you to be in it.” I said, “To be in it? What do you mean? You want me to direct?” “No, we want you to be on the billboard, wearing Gap clothes. We’re doing this series of hip young film-makers.” I’m thinking, are they trying to make fun of me? Do they know what I look like? So I said, “I’m not young, I’m 53! I don’t wear a backwards baseball cap, I’ve got white hair on my arms! I’m about as unhip as they come!”‘
[books] The lost children — more on Philip Pullman from the Sunday Times. ‘…he can’t say all the classic children’s books perpetuate unblemished childhood. What about Enid Blyton’s Famous Five who often unearthed adult wrongdoing? Here, Pullman makes a remarkable confession: such realism is taboo today. “You can’t have your heroes and heroines going off by themselves to camp on an island. The publishers wouldn’t let you do it. There are all sorts of health and safety problems, paedophiles and goodness knows what else. The fear is that children are so stupid they’ll copy what they see in books. “So in order to give children adventures now, you either have to set it in the past when that sort of thing was allowed, or in another world where the rules are different. But you can’t do it realistically.”‘ [via Haddock]
[war] The Liberation of Kabul … eyewitness report from John Simpson. ‘As we walked into Kabul city we found no problems around us, only people that were friendly and, I am afraid, chanting “kill the Taleban” – although as we understand it there are not going to be that many Taleban around. It felt extraordinarily exhilarating – to be liberating a city which had suffered so much under a cruel and stifling regime. It was 0753 local time (0323 GMT) and Kabul was a free city, after five years of perhaps the most extreme religious system anywhere on earth.’
14 November 2001
[reaction] Oliver Stone’s Chaos Theory — Stone discusses 911 and a film on terrorism…. ‘You show the Arab side and the American side in a chase film with a ‘French Connection’ urgency, where you track people by satellite, like in ‘Enemy of the State.’ My movie would have the C.I.A. guys and the F.B.I. guys, but they blow it. They’re a bunch of drunks from World War II who haven’t recovered from the disasters of the sixties?the Kennedy assassination and Vietnam. My movie would show the new heroes of security, the people who really get the job done, who know where the secrets are.” And who would that be? His eyes roamed, searching and sad. “I don’t know yet.”‘
[war] Simpson of Kabul — the Guardian profiles at John Simpson and does a brief history of war correpondants such as Max Hastings… ‘Hastings, then a 38-year-old reporter for the Evening Standard, single-handedly “took” Port Stanley when he walked alone through the British lines on the last day of the Falklands war. Hastings, son of the war correspondent Macdonald Hastings, said: “I thought, if I can walk up that road and get there first and survive and not get shot, I can bore everybody to death for the next 20 years talking about it.” Other correspondents called him “an insufferably pompous, bumptious egotist”.’ [Related: Steve Bell on John Simpson]
[history] Inspired by Tom… here is some of my Internet History…


15 November 2001
[profile] Sir Paul McCartney: Give War A Chance — McCartney on his reaction to 911: ‘It’s like we used to live with this thing every Christmas in London, where the IRA would say, “We’re doing a bombing campaign.” And we’d go, “How irksome, I hope it doesn’t hit me when I’m shopping.” After the New York attack, my attitude was like, screw you man, just screw you. I’ve got kids living in London. Are you gonna do a bombing campaign? How dare you? If you want to take my kids out — well, screw you. Come and talk about it, right in my face baby.’
[comics] Not a Hoax! Not a Dream! Not an Imaginary Story! Dr Doom’s reaction to 911…

DOOM! BY HIS EMOTIONS BETRAYED! TERROR IN A TEARDROP!

[via I Love Everything]
16 November 2001
[books] I Want to Go Ahead and Do It — old NY Times review of The Executioner’s Song by Norman Mailer‘[Schiller] …watches as Gary Gilmore’s ashes are let loose from a plastic bag to blow over Provo. The bag surprises Schiller. The bag is a bread bag, “with the printing from the bread company clearly on it . . . a 59-cent loaf of bread.”‘
17 November 2001
[war] John Simpson: The first man of KabulMartin Bell profiles the “liberator of Kabul”. ‘As for John Simpson’s politics, I have no idea (and should not have) what they are. I’d guess they are ever-so-slightly right of center. Unlike so many war zone wanderers, he is not a natural-born rebel and iconoclast. Indeed, I once shared a platform with him at the Cheltenham literary festival, where he described himself as an “establishment creep”. That’s another of his qualities: an ability to disarm his critics with self-deprecation. It’s quite common among the big beasts of TV news, and an excellent defence mechanism. I used to use it. “Dad”, asked my daughter Catherine one day, “Why do you put yourself down so much?” “Quite simple,” I answered. “I do it myself, because if I don’t there are plenty of others who will do it for me”.’
[books] Top 10 literary hoaxes’10. The Hitler diaries — In 1983 a German magazine bought 62 volumes of the ‘lost diaries’ of Adolf Hitler. These had supposedly been discovered by farmers after the plane in which the diaries had been dispatched, shortly before Hitler’s suicide, crashed. They contained such fascinating snippets of Hitler’s domestic life as “on my feet all day long” and “must not forget to get tickets for the Olympic Games for Eva Braun.”‘
18 November 2001
[war] Black Hawk Down — excellent documentary website covering the journalism on which the book and film are based … ‘The Battle of Mogadishu is known today in Somalia as Ma-alinti Rangers, or the Day of the Rangers. It pitted the world’s most sophisticated military power against a mob of civilians and Somalian irregulars. It was the biggest single firefight involving American soldiers since the Vietnam War.’
19 November 2001
[war] Why we must show the dead — Media Guardian on publishing pictures of war victims … ‘Sometimes you publish a picture to prove that something has happened. The saddest, most powerful picture I ever helped to get into the paper was of a dead woman hanging from a tree in Bosnia. There she was in everyday clothing, as though she had stepped straight out of Marks & Spencer, hanging from a branch. What struck me most was how normal she looked.’
20 November 2001
[tv] PopBitch vs. Trisha‘Following last week’s Diary entry on Popbitch regulars terrorising the Trisha Online message board for the emotionally vulnerable, events have taken a sinister turn. Hacked off with the pranksters pretending to be potential daytime-TV fodder, Anglia TV webmeisters threatened to call the police. They then traced some of the imposters’ email addresses, got in touch with their employers and warned them that they were using company time to mess with the minds of important chat show people. Which all seems more than a little heavy-handed and unnecessary.’ [Related: Trisha Message Board]
[war] Afghans Taste Freedom — Smokehammer reports from Kabul. ‘…children play happily in the dust. Half an hour ago I helped an excited group skin a dead taliban fighter and turn him into a kite.’ [via As Above]
21 November 2001
[comics] Great Comic Panels #1: The Dark Knight Returns by Frank Miller. [Related: DK2 — DC’s PR Site for Dark Knight Strikes Back]

Yes... you always say yes to anyone with a badge... or a flag... no good. ...it's way past time you learned what it means to be a man.

‘You sold us out, Clark. You gave them the power that should have been ours. Just like your parents taught you. My parents taught me a different lesson…lying on this street… shaking in deep shock… dying for no reason at all. They showed me that the world only makes sense when you force it to.’
[tv] The Lady and the Vamp — beginners guide to Buffy … ‘…take a 16-year-old girl having sex with her boyfriend, whom she loves beyond measure, for the first time – so far, so Hollyoaks. Then factor in that the boyfriend is a vampire whose human soul has been restored by a Gypsy curse; also, that one moment’s perfect happiness (making lurve, say) will break the curse and turn him back into a vampire; that once he’s turned back into a vampire, he’ll be in possession of the blackest heart Vampworld has ever seen; that his first endeavour will be to kill the girl, in the cruellest manner he can dream up; and that he, alone among the undead, has the power to open the door between good and evil.’
22 November 2001
[referrer] Lots of people searching for info about Jonathan King… here’s a link to his website. From the personal section: ‘I have a load of family and friends. Nothing too close, thank God. No appalling wives or children. They are so expensive and make a lot of unnecessary noise.’
[comics] ACME Novelty Toy Gallery — photo gallery full of Chris Ware’s paper toys … ‘The nosecone later fell off and could not be found.’ [via Cheesedip]
23 November 2001
[distractions] Check out:


[comics] Guardian Books previews Jimmy Corrigan‘Bought up as an only child by an over-protective mother, with only his fantasies about superheroes for company, Jimmy is now a middle-aged loner working as an office dogsbody in Chicago. He has just received a letter from his estranged father, inviting him to spend Thanksgiving with him.’ [via Barbelith Underground]
24 November 2001
[books] The Grip that Death could not Loosen … the mad incestuous attic stories of Virginia Andrews. ‘So, back to the attic children who have just had sex – they are both the spawn of sibling incest and engaged in sibling incest. Oh, and the widow has decided to poison them with arsenic, which makes them very pale, but still extremely attractive to one another. They realise their peril and escape, with one younger sibling (the other has died). They lead a full and unhappy life of mistreatment and suchlike. A rogue doctor has an affair with the girl sibling – it results in a pregnancy, he performs a quick DIY abortion and keeps the foetus in a jar on his desk for a laugh. In the end, the siblings marry at the age of about 50 – they pretend they are unrelated, of course. No good comes of it.’
[cartoons] 3AM Magazine interviews Steve Bell and Martin Rowson … Rowson: ‘There’s a journalist, Christopher Hitchens, whom I greatly admire. Generally because the gaudiness of his prose matches his subject matter which is what we do as cartoonist. It’s very visceral. Very immediate. There’s a wonderful line which I take as my guiding star a wonderful line of overblown journalism which he wrote in his biography of Henry Kissinger ‘ One can never eat enough to vomit enough when one thinks about Henry Kissinger.’ I met Hitchens once and went over to him and said ‘let me shake your hand for that line.’ It’s that visceral response that as a cartoonist is what I am looking for. It’s what we should do. We have to go the extra leap. The extra five yards or whatever. Say the unacceptable.’ [via Feeling Listless]
25 November 2001
[humour] How to DRIVE FAST on DRUGS while getting your WING-WANG SQUEEZED and not SPILL YOUR DRINK by P.J. O’Rourke with illustrations by George Perez (?!) … ‘Name me, if you can, a better feeling than the one you get when you’re half a bottle of Chivas in the bag with a gram of coke up your nose, and a teen-age lovely pulling off her tube top in the next seat over while you’re going a hundred miles an hour down a suburban sidestreet. You’d have to watch the entire Mexican air force crash-land in a liquid petroleum gas storage facility to match this kind of thrill.’ [via Everlasting Blort]
[comics] Big in Graphic Novels … reviews of some recently published GN’s. On Akira: ‘…Katsuhiro Otomo’s 2,000-page apocalyptic epic. Originally published in 1983 and still the finest example of the manga form, Akira ‘s vast, elaborate plot, destructive fetishism and realistic illustrative style contrast sharply with the cute, juvenile caricatures of earlier Japanese comic books.’
[tv] Richard and Judy: The Golden Couple — The Indepedent profiles Richard Madeley and Judy Finnegan… ‘When Richard Madeley ejaculates he prefers to rest his “equipment” for 25 minutes before attempting to make love with Judy Finnegan again. Or so he told the world in 1995. He has had a vasectomy, and her painful, irregular periods were the cause of a hysterectomy three years ago. This may be much more information than you need, but it represents only the tiniest sample of the personal details Richard and Judy have disclosed to the viewing public since they began presenting a live television programme called This Morning in 1988. There is nothing they won’t talk about on air, except her weight and the eight-year age gap between them. Richard is sleek, fastidious, endowed with long, shiny hair, and 45. His wife is 53, and frankly she looks it alongside her clean-cut, mane-tossing husband. She is also by far the sexier of the two.’
[conspiracy] 911: What Now? … Nicely wrapped together collection of 911 conspiracy theories. ‘Ask yourself: “Who benefits? Who gains?” Well,” says David Icke, “The Illuminati want a world government and army, a world currency and centralized global financial dictatorship and control. They want micro-chipped people and a society based on constant surveillance of all kinds at all times. And they want a frightened, docile, subservient, people who give their power away to the authorities who can save them from what they have been manipulated to fear.” That pretty well nails it down.’ [via Robot Wisdom]
26 November 2001
[film] Great review of Apocalypse Now Redux‘What passion this film has – what mad daring, what ambition. And what have we got now? CGI. Apocalypse Now is supposed to be a film you grow out of. I can only say it’s time to grow back into it again.’

Martin Sheen in Apocalypse Now


‘Never get out of the boat. Absolutely goddamn right. Unless you were goin’ all the way. Kurtz got off the boat. He split from the whole fuckin’ program.’
[film] The Cold Shoulder — great interview with Thora Birch. ‘I fit in one more question before she signals it is time for me to go. I ask if movie acting feeds her soul. Somewhat chillingly, she answers, “They feed off each other.” I never get to meet her dad (‘He’s too busy’), nor do I get to use her lavatory (‘No, um. . . No. . . Our plumbing isn’t. . . it’s not good’). The urgency with which she wants me to go actually frightens me a little.’
27 November 2001
[911] New York may be a modern-day Babylon – but it doesn’t deserve the wrath of God — commentary based on Robert Crumb apparently thinking that the other buildings around Ground Zero should collapse into it and a farm should be built on the remains. ‘Crumb, who chose to retreat from his American Babylon to the French countryside, is not, so far as I know, a religious fundamentalist. His philosophy is a peculiar and wholly subjective patchwork of frustrated sexual fantasies, zany misanthropy, and 1960s hippy-dippy iconoclasm. But his anti-urban bias is shared by fundamentalists of various kinds. And so, possibly, are some of his frustrations. The ancient idea of the city as a harlot, as Sodom and Gomorrah, suggests a deep attraction as well as revulsion. It is perhaps not so very odd that some of the hijackers of September 11 caroused in Las Vegas before seeking their martyrdom.’
[comics] The Dave Sim Memorial Note From The President Archive … has moved to a new home on the Cerebus Fangirl site. Example… Sim jousts with Judy: ‘She kept it up for a good long while, snappy repartee, brushing her boobs against my upper arm. As I told her, it was like trying to pick up lint with a magnet. A magnet is a very powerful attractor, but it is of no use if you want to get lint off your jacket. Finally, her eyes blazing, she looked me square in the eye and said, “Any man who is afraid of women is a wimp!” I looked her square in the eye and said, “Any man who isn’t wary of women is a fool.” I left shortly after.’
[school] Foe’s Reunited … confirms my feeling that Friends Reunited is evil and wrong. ‘Man’s greatest joy is to slay his enemy, plunder his riches, ride his steeds, see the tears of his loved ones and embrace his women.” – Genghis Khan’ [via Parallax View via Dutchbint]
28 November 2001
[comics] Photoshop this comic book cover … from Oddball Comics. [via Haddock]

Dell's The Rifleman -- A mysterious bag holds the secret to an outlaw's past and a threat against Lucas and Mark McCain.

‘Y’know, I’ve heard the term “sportin’ a woody” before — but this… this… this is just plain ridiculous! And the expressions on the faces of Chuck Connors and Johnny Crawford just make things worse — or at least, funnier!’ [MORE]
29 November 2001
[books] The Digested Read — Madonna by Andrew Morton‘Surprise success of first album – some songs weak, shock horror – then effortless meteoric rise to superstardom. Control freak, more failed affairs – “she’s very needy, she never stops ringing you” – abortions, Sean Penn, more albums, loads of celebs, sex. Did I mention she was a control freak? Career nosedives, resurrected by Norman Mailer, desperate to be Evita, desperate to be loved, more failed love – “she wasn’t very adventurous in bed” – more albums. Clunk, clunk, clunk.’
[war] Dead Lie Crushed or Shot, in the Dust, in Ditches, Amid the Willows — Luke Harding’s reports from the massacre in Mazar-i-Sharif have been excellent over the last couple of days … ‘Beyond the gazebo, next to where the Taliban had set up a makeshift mortar factory, were the corpses of several well-off Arab volunteers. Unlike their Pakistani counterparts, dressed in flimsy salwar kameezes, the Arabs wore expensive fleece jackets and trousers. One Talib corpse sported a San Francisco 49ers football sweatshirt; another a zip-up Dolce & Gabbana top. Osama bin Laden’s fighters may have rejected the west’s relativist ideology, but not its fashions.’
30 November 2001
[comics] Attack of the Condensed Comics Classics! Judge Dredd: ‘CITIZEN: Hello! (Fires Lawgiver into obvious perp twenty-five times) DREDD: Sometimes I feel bad about the fascist regime I perpetuate. (Fires Lawgiver into obvious perp twenty-five more times) DREDD: Sometimes I don’t.’

Hellblazer: ‘CONSTANTINE: Time for some cigs and a pint! DEMON FROM HELL: Hsst! Snarl! CONSTANTINE: Fuck, there goes another girlfriend.’

[war] More from Luke Harding in the Guardian…

  • Allies direct the death rites of trapped Taliban fighters‘Last night a small group of up to 40 volunteers were still holed up in a house in the corner of the castle’s rambling compound. They signalled their presence with firework-like bursts of gunfire, just to remind their enemies crouching on the shadowy ramparts above them that they were not yet dead. After spending years killing their fellow Muslims, the Taliban’s Arab and Pakistani fighters have finally got the jihad they were looking for. The foreign volunteers – who surrendered on Saturday only to overpower their guards the following day – know they have hours to live.’
  • A tank roared in. It fired four rounds. Then there was silence in the fort‘Three Pakistani Taliban escaped from the 19th century fort on Monday night by scrambling out of a water channel. Two were shot dead immediately, but a third got as far as the nearby mud-walled village of Sar-i-Pool. There local people discovered him and killed him. He had some bread in his pocket, they said.’

[war] Bin Laden could be Time’s Person of the Year‘Matthew Felling of the Center for Media and Public Affairs said: “Previous choices have taught us not to attach moral value to the term ‘man.’ There is a reason Time does not use the term ‘Gentleman of the Year.’ Man of the Year is not an honor so much as it is a title; it doesn’t require an honorable person be named. Some years the biggest noise is applause ? some years it’s weeping. This choice would reflect that.” The historically significant men have been a motley crew since Time started naming them in 1927. Hitler was named Man of the Year in 1938. Joseph Stalin made the cover in 1939 and 1942, and Ayatollah Khomeini was on the front in 1979.’
[film] My life as a scumbag … Iranian-British comedian Omid Djalili on what it’s like to be cast as a middle-eastern villian all the time. ‘And thus it all started, taking in all manner of Arab scumbag roles, the highlight of course having my genitalia manhandled by the late, great Ollie Reed in Gladiator in my favourite scene: “You sold me queer giraffes.” Of course, type-casting will always be a concern, but I did pop up in the last Bond film, The World Is Not Enough, in a ground-breaking role as an Azerbaijani oilpipe foreman – a major departure.’
1 December 2001
[king] The Fall of a Pop Impresario [Part 1 | Part 2] … Jon Ronson takes a break from the secret rulers of the world and spends a while with Jonathan King. ‘In mid-October 2001, I have coffee with Jonathan King’s brother, Andy. He’s just visited Jonathan in Belmarsh for the first time. “How is Jonathan doing?” I ask. “Great,” says Andy. “He seems really cheerful. Talking 10 to a dozen.” “Really?” I ask. “He’s wearing pink pyjamas as a silent protest,” Andy tells me. “He says it’s aesthetically reminiscent of the way gays were treated under the Nazis.”‘
[film] This is so me… [via Meg]

Christopher Lee -- a modern master of horror!

If I was a James Bond villain, I would be Francisco Scaramanga.

I enjoy good food, monopolising the world’s energy supplies, and sex before assassinating people.

I am played by Christopher Lee in The Man with the Golden Gun.

Who would you be? James Bond Villain Personality Test


2 December 2001
[evil] Honestly, you haven’t Changed a Bit … an Observer Journalist meets her first love and profiles Friends Reunited‘…others take a darker view [of Friends Reunited]. ‘The majority of people leave school feeling like a failure,’ says Oliver James, clinical psychologist and author of Britain on the Couch . ‘They’ve failed academically, or on the sports field, or sexually. That’s why so many people have recurring dreams about school examinations – it’s a way of managing anxiety. These people may desire to return to the past, but this time they want it to be a different experience, a more positive one. To be given the opportunity to do that is obviously very attractive.’ Hence all the biographies on the FriendsReunited site in which people refer to the fact that they are no longer fat or spotty, and boast that they are happily married with two gorgeous children. These people are bolstering their self-esteem, something that school – and especially the horrid little beasts in the playground – singularly failed to do.’
3 December 2001
[web] A Cunt Compendium … The Nathan Barley Extravaganza — All your favourite Cunts in one place. ‘The continuing adventures of a total wank stain.’ [Related: TVGoHome]

The most revolting Cunt I could find.

[blogs] Who or what is the Orbyt Collective? ‘So, if you, the “readership” think that Team Orbyt are a bunch of twatsticks and chimneyfuckers, tell us what you’d do differently. Prove wrong the theory that weblogging occupies the time of those unable to write and those unable to edit. Make us better.’
[watching] True Romance‘Wanna see what Spiderman number one looks like?’
4 December 2001
[comics] Classic Spider-Man Television Series 1967-1970 — New Real Audio episode every Saturday… ‘This is a true icon of television and it captures the spirit, the feel and the smell of the 1960’s Lee / Ditko / Romita era of our favorite wallcrawler.’
[distraction] Addictive Car Game — Yet another frustrating and addictive game… [via Bifurcated Rivets]
[comics] UK TV Advert for the first issue Prog of 2000AD from 1977. ‘Greetings! I am Tharg!’ [via Bugpowder]
5 December 2001
[celebs] Cruise speaks out on Cruz — Tom Cruise on Penelope Cruz and Scientology… ‘The actor vigorously defended his religion, Scientology, which he said had kept him on the straight and narrow since he was 24 years old. “I started reading books on it and I thought “God, this makes sense’,” he said.’

Who is Xenu? …described as the core belief of Scientology by Operation Clambake. ‘Once upon a time (75 million years ago to be more precise) there was an alien galactic ruler named Xenu. Xenu was in charge of all the planets in this part of the galaxy including our own planet Earth, except in those days it was called Teegeeack.’
[politics] The Guardian has the inside story on the Tory Leadership race from Ken Clarke’s campaign manager … ‘The party I joined was full of nice old people; today, it is full of nasty old people. Their hatred of gays, blacks, successful women and the European Union is as extraordinary as it is offensive. [..] They cannot be reasoned with.’
[comics] Great Frank Miller interview from the Onion AV Club‘I remember opening up this Batman comic and just basically falling into it. I can’t tell you which one it was or anything, but I just remember, the way the city was drawn, and the fact that this guy was dressed like a bat, just took my breath away. When I was doing Dark Knight, I was essentially trying to evoke that same feeling, but to an older and more sophisticated audience. Of course, the guy dresses like a bat — what kind of guy would do that? He’s got to be kind of strange.’ [via I Love Everything]
[weblogs] Watch the UK Bloggers update… Recently Updated GBlogs is back and is vastly improved — it cycles through the list of 369 GBlogs every thirty minutes to find out what has changed… [Related: Jezuk’s Version]
6 December 2001
[columbine] I’m Full of Hate and I Love It — The Secret Diary of Eric Harris… ‘Right now I’m trying to get fucked and trying to finish off these time bombs. Why the fuck can’t I get any? I mean, I’m nice and considerate and all that shit, but nooooo… […] I hate you people for leaving me out of so many fun things. And no, don’t fucking say, ‘Well, that’s your fault’ because it isn’t, you people had my phone #, and I asked and all, but no no no no no don’t let the weird looking Eric kid come along, oooh fucking nooo.” That is how the journal ends — not with the howl of the wolf-god, but the whine of the pathetic geek who can’t land a prom date. And decides everybody deserves to die.’ [via Metafilter]
[comics] Passnotes #1,967: Bobby Fischer‘[Q] Why does he hate the US? [A] Fischer, who was born in Brooklyn, believes it is part of a worldwide Jewish conspiracy to destroy him. He is being pursued for back taxes; the FBI issued an arrest warrant for playing a match against Boris Spassky in outlawed Serbia in 1992; and, worst of all, the government raided a storage depot in Pasadena and confiscated his possessions, including a large collection of comics and a signed photograph of President Nixon.’
7 December 2001
[comics] Graphic novel wins First Book AwardChris Ware wins the Guardian First Book Award for 2001 with Jimmy Corrigan: The Smartest Kid on Earth. ‘Claire Armitstead, chair of the judges and literary editor of the Guardian, said: “Jimmy Corrigan is a fantastic winner, because it so clearly shows what the Guardian First Book Award is about – originality and energy and star quality, both in imagination and in execution. Chris Ware has produced a book as beautiful as any published this year, but also one which challenges us to think again about what literature is and where it is going at the start of the 21st century.”‘
[comics] I still have overwhelming doubt about my ability — an interview with Chris Ware from The Guardian today… ‘Purposelessness. Ware likes this, the fact that the art-school snobs think his work is trivial. It strengthens his faith in the crooked path, the unorthodox way. For example, in the book, the story is interrupted by cute little sections to cut out and make into 3-D sets. Ware doesn’t imagine that anyone will actually do this. But he put them in anyway. “They hold the promise of enjoyment through lonely activity, which I like. And I’ve always thought there’s something very delicate and innocent about paper assemblage.”‘ [Related: ACME Novelty Toy Gallery]
[reaction] Heartbreaking Work — interview with Dave Eggers on his reaction to 911 … ‘They made 6,000 people, all with families and loves and dreams, into one amorphous symbol. The challenge now is for us to refrain from the same thing. Those lost do not, I don’t think, symbolize anything, nor does the attack. No act of murder can be symbolic–it’s always barbaric and should never be dignified in any such way at all. Six thousand individuals were murdered, and the best way to dignify the victims is to resist making sense of a mass murder.’ [via Bitstream]
8 December 2001
[reading] DK2‘Kids, these days. Can’t tell the difference between just plain old and classic.’
[profiles] First Among Gonzos — yet another Louis Theroux profile… ‘There have been moments when the Theroux charm hasn’t worked. “I’ve been surprised at some of the animosity,” says Clifford. “I had to take Westlife to a hospital which Louis was supposed to film. But the hospital said, ‘We don’t like the programme. We don’t want him to be there’. I suppose it’s because people think he’s taking the piss.” Although Theroux is friendly to his subjects to the point of deference, he does put some backs up. He was once found to be on a Combat 18 hit-list, proving in the nasty post-Dando world that anything is possible for a high-profile personality.’
9 December 2001
[comics] The genius of Jimmy — Raymond Briggs on Jimmy Corrigan … ‘Jonathan Cape also publish Rushdie, Amis, McEwan and Barnes, so can this mean that the modest Mr F C Ware has got a foot in the door of this pantheon? After all, his book is thicker and more expensive than theirs. Full colour throughout! And does it mean that we will live to see an ancient Dame Posy Simmonds go tottering by? ‘

Bugpowder posts a transcript of a Late Show Review of Corrigan between Tom Paulin, Dominic Lawson, Craig Brown and Miranda Sawyer. Paulin: ‘…the colours are dreadful, it’s like looking at a bottle of Domestos or Harpic or Ajax. Awful bleak colours, revolting to look at, it’s on it’s way to the Oxfam shop.’
[photoshop] Something Awful photoshops Bin Laden’s Mountain Fortress‘Wow, Osama is like a villain in a James Bond movie… except that he doesn’t speak English and doesn’t have any sexy female underlings because he thinks the sight of a woman’s bared ankle will scorch his retinas.’
10 December 2001
Spider Jerusalem microhero[comics] First there were storTroopers… then blogTroopers… now comes various Micro Heroes and Villians. [via Neilalien] More:


[celeb] Happy Camper — Independent profile of Julian Clary‘He’s done quite a few lengthy profiles over the years and I wonder how it feels, picking up a newspaper or magazine and reading all about yourself. “I always get bored halfway through. It’s a formula, isn’t it. You start with: ‘Julian turns up wearing an expensive-looking jumper and too much jewellery.’ Then it’s the potted history, which is when I glaze over, and then there might be an interesting bit at the end.” “That does sound slightly familiar,” I concede. “Change the formula,” he says. “How?” “I dunno.” “Ho-hum. That’s a nice jumper you’re wearing, Julian. Expensive?” “Yes. And rather hot.”‘
[email] Excellent post on the life-cycle of a mailing list. Stage Five: ‘Discomfort with diversity (the number of messages increases dramatically; not every thread is fascinating to every reader; people start complaining about the signal-to-noise ratio; person 1 threatens to quit if *other* people don’t limit discussion to person 1’s pet topic; person 2 agrees with person 1; person 3 tells 1 & 2 to lighten up; more bandwidth is wasted complaining about off-topic threads than is used for the threads themselves; everyone gets annoyed)’